Feline Manners

[kyra_ojosverdes]

How in the world does one teach a cat manners? Dogs, sure. Cats?

Jack will not eat off people-dishes. The first time Mark offered Jack some bits of chicken, on a little plate, Jack looked horribly conflicted. (Sort of like when Mark picked him up and put him on the table. He knew he wasn't allowed to be on the table, but he also wasn't supposed to jump away from the kid, that'd just be rude.) He obviously wanted to eat the chicken, but was also obviously certain he was not allowed to eat the chicken, and confused as hell as to why the kid was trying to trick him into eating the chicken. We've since discovered that he'll happily eat the people-food scraps if they're put into his food dish. Only if they're put into his food dish. Not beside his food dish. Inside his food dish.

Jack will meow to be fed in the morning, but only if he thinks you're already awake. If one of the kids is up, he doesn't bother with me. He meows to get the kid's attention, then walks to the top of the stairs and waits for the kid to follow. If the kid fails to follow, he meows again. He then leads the kid down the stairs and to his food and water dishes or, if his litterbox needs some attention, to said litterbox. Then he sits and waits expectantly as his needs are tended to.

If my room is messy, he's in a terrible fix. He won't step on clothing, phone books, papers... he likes to spend lots of time under my bed, so a blocked path is a real problem for him. Before I realized what the issue was, I'd watch him stand there all perplexed, trying to figure out how to get from Point A to Point B without stepping on anything. Interestingly enough he'll step on the phone, which sits on the floor. It's the base to a cordless phone, and so has a nice big speakerphone button right in the middle of it. He'd step on that button everytime, then jump a foot or two at the very loud dial tone. Poor Jack.

Now, he'll pee in corners and on clothing left on the floor. He does look guilty when caught, and runs to hide under my bed. We still have occasional problems with his biting the kids during a petting session. He won't jump up on the counters. He won't jump onto the table, and was very relieved, that one time, when I told Mark that Jack wasn't allowed on the table and to please lift him down. He only jumps onto beds in order to cuddle, never to wake anyone. He's never broken anything.

Who taught this cat manners, and how??? (For those who don't know, we got Jack at the animal shelter in November. He was neutered and declawed and is an indoors-only cat.)

ETA: general opinion in comments is that Jack's former owners were awfully (as in awful) firm in their discipline. This makes me sad. Jack is such a sweet kitty. :-(

Comments

[sweet-byrd.livejournal.com]

When we got our pillow-top matress cover, Yosemite wasn't too sure about walking on it -- it felf funny and she was clearly uncomfortable with the way it felt. Now, however, she has no problem about jumping up on it and walking around like she owns the place. Jack's meowing and people-retrieval habits are very Yosemite-like, too, and we have had our cat baby since she was about 6 weeks old (though the people she was with before were total shits -- witness the story of her adoption -- she never seemed to have a fear of people).

I know some pet owners) train their dogs and cats to never eat out of anything but a pet dish because some people (especially in rural areas) mix poison with tuna or other food to get rid of rats, racoons, coyotes and other animals they feel are undesireable. An unwary cat or dog is in danger, so people mix cayenne pepper with 'outside the dish' food to teach their pets that food that isn't in their dish is a bad thing. While you cuold debate the abusiveness of feeding hot pepper to a pet, in training fluffy or fido to not eat except out of their dish as a lifesaving measure, it is at least purposeful.

Also, does Jack only pee on dirty clothing? It might just be some kind of scent marking behavior (though I have to admit, your descriptions of his behavior did make 'abuse' jump to my mind right away).

[kyra-ojosverdes.livejournal.com]

Just on dirty clothing that I know of.

[sweet-byrd.livejournal.com]

Cats can get very strange about scent. If he feels like you are claiming the whole darned place with things that have human scent very strongly on them, he might feel the need to assert himself and claim some territory for himself. Like saying "Hey, I deserve some space too, humans!". But then he knows he has just challenged your dominance by challenging your territory, so he's nervous because that kind of thing can start a fight in cat politics -- and he doesn't really want to fight with you, because you are nice people and he wants to stay in your cat-tribe. But he feels the need to assert his right to space. It may be something similar with not walking on clothes -- the smell so strongly of 'people' that he doesn't want to trespass (literally) on them.

The biting when petting too long is pretty common, too. Some cats just seem to get overloaded and nip or bite after too much affection. After a while, you'll notice the behavior that pre-warns about the overload nipping, and you can put him down before it gets that far.

Most of that is just conjecture, of course, but it is consistant with cat sociology and psychology (as I know it). There is a book by Desmond Morries (of The Naked Ape fame) called Catwatching: Why cats purr and everything else you wanted to know one called The Tribe of Tiger and one called The Character of Cats : The Origins, Intelligence, Behavior and Stratagems of felis silvestris catus that provide interesting biological and "anthropological" (cat-thropological?) information and observations on cats, if you (or the kids) ever feel the need to find out more. All three are easily obtainable at used book stores and public libraries.

[kyra-ojosverdes.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the cat book recommendations! I'm sure we'll be checking those out at some point.

Jack has never bitten me, only the kids. I've been in the same room when it's happened... no warning sounds... but never <>seen it, to know if Jack is giving some movement or other "leave me alone now" cues. From all reports, he just bites out of the blue. :-\

Interesting stuff on the scent... hmm.

[sweet-byrd.livejournal.com]

When Yosemite bites from overload she doesn't growl or anything -- her pupils dilate and her whiskers some forward and her demeanor is more pounce-y/hunt-y than laid back and loving. But she can go from one to the other in a flash (Kind of like love, love, love, love, KILLBITEKICK!), and the signs are very subtle. I'd say it was more an expression on her face, than anything else. It really does seem out of the blue, and I can't predict it 100% of the time, but if she tenses up, or her eyes suddenly dilate for no discernable reason while petting I'm her, it is time for a kitty time-out.

I found that putting a sock over my hand and letting the cat play-bite and wrestle with it that way gets out a lot of her need to play and fight. Also, shining a flashlight on the floor and wall and letting her chase it helps, too. Taking a couple kitty treats and letting her eat them off of the 'dead' body of her sock prey seems to fill some deep-seated huntress-like need in her. If she is acting strange and fiesty and violent, often a round of sock-wrestling will settle her down.

Cats of all kinds are very scent-attuned, and very sensitive to issues of territory (both of which feed into some of the notorious problems that people have had when trying to change brands of cat litter -- the new stuff smells different than the old stuff, and moreover, it is a new smell in the cat's intimate space). I have heard that this is true for male cats especially, and is expecially pronounced in all cats during the spring.

Since cats are pack creatures, he might also still be figuring out what his role in the pack is, espcially since your particular pack seems to be kitten-heavy. Who has what role is a pretty important question to a cat, and until he feels comfortable in his role, he might be moody, skittish, or hyper-correct.

Sometimes my cat-child seems so familiar to me that I forget that our mental templates of the world and how it works can be so different.

You are quite welcome about the books. I found the Tribe of Tiger to be quite interesting, though the Desmond Morris book addresses a lot of housecat-specific questions and issues.